My Parents Were Uncool Too...

Yep, we’re old – thanks for the reminder. You probably wonder whether we even were your age once. But…it’s true. Every one of us had a childhood – for better or worse. And someday maybe you’ll look back at these times – when you thought we were the worst or dumbest humans on the planet – and have a tiny bit of empathy for us. Maybe…

When many of us took on the science experiment of becoming parents, we really believed we were cool. We were so unlike our parents – dressed a lot better, listened to hipper music. We figured having a little person would become the seal of approval for adulthood, because…we were going to do it all differently. But the moment you entered our lives, we quickly learned how foolish our assumptions actually were.

From the moment we left the hospital, birthing center, or midwife left our house, we were given nothing, but a wish and prayer. Unlike the endless paperwork and documents exchanged with the purchasing of a new car or home, we’re handed this tiny human and told “goodbye” and “good luck”.

“What the &$%# does that mean?” we muttered. Some of us read volumes and took extensive classes on child-birthing, but child-rearing? We got no handbook or Cliff’s Notes –

Wait. Let’s take a step back…There are classes and books about child-rearing, but they’re bogus. They’re guesses – at best – in how to raise the average kid in an average home supported by parents making average incomes. None of the authors or instructors was your parent. None of them sat up all night wondering which pain-reliever to administer – Tylenol? Motrin? And none of them have the expertise in parenting either. They’re winging it even with all their degrees and certifications confirming their ‘expertise.’ In truth, they’re expert guessers. Just like us.

Days after we officially became your parents, we fully understood the meaning of the phrase “children change your life…forever”. When everything we ate, drank, and breathed revolved around what you needed or wanted, we quickly traded our cool-points for an early bedtime and a hope for a better night of sleep. Days and nights hanging out with friends at the trendiest clubs or restaurants no longer mattered. Our shift for this job, was 24-7, no vacation time accrued and limited pee-breaks.

Now, don’t get me wrong, most of us aren’t sorry with the transition. It probably made some of us more reliable, and definitely made us all more responsible. Still, having you gave us the final test – are you living for yourself or your kid? It’s hard – being a parent, clearing the way for someone who can’t fully understand the amount of sweat and sacrifice you’ve put in until they do the same. But, we do it…because – as cheesy and annoying as it sounds – we love you.

And we make mistakes – some of us are more open to admitting it than others, but we make them. Every. Damn. Day. We second-guess the punishments we’ve doled out, question whether we’re doing a good job, and even wonder if this whole parenting thing is cut out for us…Yet, we’d do it again. Knowing all of our flaws and failures come with a guarantee in parenting, we’d still take on the challenge – like a mother-$*%#er.

But why? Why are we so open to drop the cool clothes, music, and lifestyle to be sooo uncool as a parent? Because that is the ultimate survival test: raising another human and watching them grow and flourish when they fly away. Do some of us fail (over-parent, under-parent, or abandon our children)? Yep. Sadly, some do, I’m afraid…and in those cases, I can only say, you’re better than them. And you deserved better too. But most of us try really, really, really hard to just do our best… So just before we leave this earth, when our last breaths expel from our bodies, we can confidently say, “I did it!” And you are the proof that we did...